I've been MIA big time!

Apparently I lost that loving feeling for blogging. There has been a lot going on in the Maatman world. So much so I don't know where to start. Philip just turned 18 months and is in fact the cutest thing I have ever laid my eyes on. I won't trade him for the world or any amount of money. I have another blog, which I have neglected as well, but updated with the juicy details of what has happened as of late. You can find it here if you are interested. Email me and I will add you to the blog as it is set as private for a very good reason.

First boo-boo....Ouch!

This is what happened today when I was at work.....he was with Ryan's mom!

His first boo-boo and it happens to be on the day he is going to see the doc for his 1 year visit. She said he was pushing the stroller and slipped, I think he fell down her step on the front porch. She said he didn't cry.....I think he must have SCREAMED bloody murder. He was very clingy today and I don't blame him.

Here are his sats:

25 pounds 2 ounces

32 inches long

The doctor thinks Philip is going to be huge.....I hope he is right and not short like his mommy.

I have started....

another blog where I'm going to blog more private matters. If you would like an invite, leave a comment here and I'll add you to the new blog. Somethings are better when they aren't shared with the world!

I can't believe the weekend has come and gone already. We had a big weekend. Saturday we drove up to Big Rapids to move my sister into a new apartment for the summer. While Ryan, mom and dad were at the old apartment, I stayed at the new one with Philip. The old apartment had lots of stairs and I was afraid Philip would want to do nothing but climb them. Instead I had to entertain him in an apartment that wasn't made for children. Needless to say there were lots of buttons and knobs and cords to pull on. Boy did I get a workout in. Sunday I had to work and then had all my mommy chores to do. It is now 9:30 and I'm the only one still awake in my house. I have laundry going and dishes need to get done and a diaper bag to pack. Makes me tired just thinking about all of it. I have to only work 2 hours tomorrow and then am taking personal time and then back to school for a preview night. Should be interesting, the preview night that is.

Well back to my chores so I can lay down and watch the news while I fall asleep.

Happy Moanday everyone!

Happy 1st Birthday!

We Love You Philip Benjamin!

Love,

Mommy and Daddy

1 year ago...

today I was sitting in the lawn, in a chair watching Ryan lay mulch. We had had a busy day with our doctors appointment, packing our hospital bag and then Ryan laying 3 truckloads of mulch. I can't believe that one year ago today was the last time I was pregnant! Wow it doesn't seem like it should have been that long ago. I can say that I honestly miss being pregnant. Am I looking forward to going through everything to get there again, absolutely not. Will I venture down that road, absolutely! As of late, many people have been asking me when the next "baby" will come along. Philip is still a baby to me, even though he is fully walking now and drinking from a sippy cup 2% milk. Wow, a lot has changed in a year's time. I remember the excitement I had when I went with my husband for our last "couple" dinner. Just knowing that we wouldn't be just 2 anymore, but a table for 2 with a highchair. Sometimes I still get weepy when I think back to Philip being born. I never in my wildest dreams imagined I would be a mom. I still pinch myself sometimes when he calls me Momma.

As I sat back and reflected on my last post, I realized a couple of things. First, Ryan isn't cruel to me. He actually loves me, just in a different way now. That is ok. It's also ok that I have to remind him that I need mommy time. He is, afterall a man, and let's face it....they all think alike! Second, he is the best father I could have ever asked for. Little did I know, when we got married 5 years ago, that I could and would fall in love with him more. So many times you hear wives complain about their husbands and you find yourself wondering if and how much they love their husbands. I may complain about him, but I sure do love him and I know that he loves me too. I need to start working on showing him that and stop pointing out the bad things. I have decided that I'm going to take the advice of MckMamma and start helping him to see that I don't and won't always be happy, but together we can make a difference. I go, he goes...then maybe he will be more willing to pay it forward every once in awhile. He isn't always going to make me happy, and vice versa. I have to say that some really dirty thoughts just came into my mind as I re-read those last sentences. Oh, my! Oh la la!

Now here I am, on the eve of my son's first birthday and finding myself weepy and teary eyed. Not for what I miss, and boy do I miss some of his stages, but for what the future holds for my little boy. We couldn't have asked for a better 1st child and I know that he will do great things in his lifetime.

Mommy and Daddy love you buggy! XOXO

Happy Mother's Day!

I can't believe it...my 1st Mother's Day as a mom. Wow, I never in my wildest dreams believed I would ever be here. We had quite the wild weekend. Friday night I spent working. Not something I had planned on, but helped out a friend in need who needed off to go to an event with her children. I wasn't going to work, but then thought to myself that I may need the same help someday too. Saturday my sister graduated from college. OH MY GOSH did she grow up way too fast. The day was a whirlwind of non-stop action. We had lots of fun though and I'm so happy for her in her next chapter of life. The day was filled with much drama and am glad that it is behind us. Let's just sum it up and say these key phrases.....sister's old boyfriend of 6 years and the new guy that likes her in the SAME PLACE. It wasn't pretty for a few moments, let me tell ya! Here are a few pictures of the day.

Here are my boys on Saturday





Here is my sister getting her diploma.

She is a double major in Accounting and Finance. Now she on the hunt for a job. Not the best time to graduate from college, but she is keeping a positive outlook on things. I know she will get a job in her field. She has such a go get'em outlook on things and that will help her to go far.

This morning was fun. We went to breakfast with Ryan's mom this morning and then my family came over this afternoon. We had tacos for dinner....not my choice! I wanted some steak, but I didn't get the final say.

My husband actually got me a card from Philip and a card from him. The card from him wasn't anything I would have picked out, but hey...beggers can't be choosers, huh. I sometimes wonder if he really does love me, or if he feels like he is stuck here now that we have Philip. I feel more like a burden most days then I feel like a wife. I know we are still feeling things out yet now that we are a family of 3, but I just don't feel like he feels the same about me anymore. He is such a good dad and puts Philip and his needs first. I love him for that.

Walking.....

Our little guy is officially walking these days. I can't believe it. He can't stand up from a sitting position, without pulling himself up on something....but we are getting there. I thought for sure he would walk long before now. Here is a crappy video I took, but you can see him marching away. I'll take a better one and post it soon!

I wish I could freeze time and keep him at this stage forever. With a few exceptions of course! He is into screaming, like a girl, at the top of his lungs. This is ok if he is at the house, or in the car.....but not when we are out to eat or at the store. He, though, seems to think it is. Tonight we were out to dinner and he was screaming like a girl. We were at a restaurant that caters more to the older generation and I didn't want them to make comments about him being "unruly." To be honest he was being unruly. From the very first scream I began telling him no. With each scream, my no's became more stern and matter of fact. After me telling him no, he decided he would stare straight at me and begin to dig me with his finger nails. Now Philip is not even 1 yet. Where did this come from? He is only with a 2 year old, and I don't know if that is where he learned it or not. My question now is....How do I stop this behavior? After about the 50th scream, I took him into the bathroom. Now before you chastise me...I didn't spank him. What I wanted to do was remove him from the situation and gain a fresh start. It worked for about 20 minutes and then it was back to the screams.